Puttiing things in contexts

I often wonder why people may change their decisions when questions are put in different contexts. Here is an example. I read Peter Franklin's story from the book "Better" by Atul Gawande. One day, Peter became sick so he called his father who is a doctor. He went through a chest X-Ray and they found a very large tumor in his chest. However, his dad also discovered that Peter had a chest X-ray four years ago. He went back to look at the diagnosis and found that the radiologist discovered his tumor then but it was never mentioned to Peter. Eventually, the Franklins sue the doctors and they won the case and was awarded $600,000 in damages. Peter eventually survived the aggressive treatments.

Here is when things become interesting to me. After completing medical school, Peter decided to move into radiology. However, he was rejected by his top-choice residency programs. His dean at Boston University called the chairman of the radiology department and they told him that he did not get in because "This guy's a maverick! He's suing doctors!". Then, the dean told Peter's story and asked "If this was your son, what would you do?" And, Peter got accepted after that.

So, what is the moral of this story? Why our decisions are shaped by the contexts? Why do we need others to rephrase the question for us to develop compassion towards other human beings? Why can't we use our own imagination and put things into perspectives ourselves?

Power

"In school you learn lots of things. You learn how to read and write. You learn about the world. You learn how to care for yourself and others. When you care for others, there is peace."

From 7-year-old Cassie Eng who collected 34,002 pennies in the Pennies for Peace project at her birthday party.

Today's thought

Today's thought is inspired by what I read in the book "The Soloist":

"Do not worry about far-off future. Just get off the street safely and be thankful. Honor your mother and father. Don't be disrespectful to people, be good and maybe life will take care of itself."

Please call me by my true name

A beautiful poem by Thich Nhat Hanh:

Do not say I depart tomorrow,
for even today I still arrive.

Look deeply: I arrive in every moment,
to be a bud on a branch,
to be a tiny bird with wings still fragile,
learning to sing in my new nest,
to be a caterpillar in the hearth of a flower,
to be jewel hiding itself in a stone.

I still arrive in order to laugh and to cry
in order to fear and to hope.
the rhythm of my heart is the birth and
death of all that are alive.

I am the may fly metamorphosing
on the surface of a river,
and I am the bird, which when spring comes,
arrives in time to eat the mayfly.

I am the frog, swimming happily
in the clear waters of my pond,
and I am the grass-snake who,
approaching in silence,
feeds itself on the frog.

I am the child in Uganda, all skin and bones,
my legs as thin as bamboo sticks,
and I am the arms merchant, selling deadly
weapons to Uganda.

I am the 12 year old girl, refugee on a small boat,
who throws herself into the ocean
after being raped by a sea pirate,
and I am the pirate, my heart not yet capable
of seeing and and loving.

I am a member of the politburo
with plenty of power in my hands,
and I am the man who has to pay his
“debt of blood” to my people,
dying slowly in a forced labor camp.

My joy is like spring so warm it makes
flowers bloom in all walks of life.
My pain like a river of tears, so full it
fills up the four oceans.

Please call me by my true names,
so I can hear all my cries and my laughs at once,
So that I can see that my joy and my pain are one.

Please call me by my true names,
so I can wake up,
that so the doors of my heart can be left open,
the doors of compassion.

Angry chicken

"In order for chickens to produce more eggs, the farmers create artificial days and nights. They use indoor lighting to create a shorter day and a shorter night so that the chickens believe that twenty-four hours have passed, and then they produce more eggs. There is a lot of anger, a lot of frustration, and much suffering in the chickens. They express their anger and frustration by attacking the chickens next to them. They use their beaks to peck and wound each other. They cause each other to bleed, to suffer, and to die."

From the book "Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames" by Thich Nhat Hanh

Reason .....

Wisdom from "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" ......

The Grinch hated Christmas! .....
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

Karma and compassion

"You need to contemplate ... that you must die ... When you have done so, you will pay more attention to the deeper aspects of life; you will focus on the way that karma works--the ways your own actions bring about specific effects. When you recognize that ..., you will determine what is important ..."

From the book "Becoming Enlightened" by His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Reminding myself of the three questions

"Remember then that there is only one important time, and that time is now. The most important one is always the one you are with. And the most important thing is to do good for the one who is standing at your side. For these, my dear boy, are the answers to what is most important in this world."

From "The Three Questions" by Jon J. Muth adapted from Leo Tolstoy's story

The paradox of power

I recently read an article in the Wall Street Journal entitled "The Power Trip". Here what it has to say about people in power:

1. According to the article, people give authority to people whom they genuinely like. In other words, people who climb up to a powerful position are those nice people.
   
   
2. However, once they rise to the top, they change. "When you give people power, they basically start acting like fools. They flirt inappropriately, tease in a hostile fashion, and become totally impulsive." said Professor Keltner.
   
   
3. Why does power lead people engage in unethical behaviors (think Bill Clinton with Monica Lewinsky or Blogojevich's bribe case or Mark Hurd's expense account fudging here)? Psychologists argued that one of the main problems with authority is that "it makes us less sympathetic to the concerns and emotion of others."
   

Life lesson #1 from the Three Cups of Tea

The first life lesson that I learn from the book "Three Cups of Tea" is:
"Focusing on our our commonalities instead of differences enables us to be more compassionate towards others."

The importance of imagination

Here is part of J.K. Rowling's 2008 Harvard Commencement Speech that I really like:

"If you choose to use your status and influence to raise your voice on behalf of those who have no voice; if you choose to identify not only with the powerful, but with the powerless; if you retain the ability to imagine yourself into the lives of those who do not have your advantages, then it will not only be your proud families who celebrate your existence, but thousands and millions of people whose reality you have helped change. We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better."

Humanism movement in medical education

I read a piece in the NYTimes today titled "Bring Doctors to the Dying Patient's Bedside". I applauded this movement that emphasize the human side of medical treatments and cares. We are all humans. Doctors are humans with medical expertise. Patients are humans with expertise on their illness, symptoms, etc. It is very nice to hear that they have the white coat ceremony in which first-year medical students pledge to provide compassionate care.

Lester Z. Lieberman, founding chairman of the Healthcare Foundation of New Jersey said that "we are hoping to gain some leverage with these young doctors, so that they go out and practice and treat their patients as human beings and press their colleagues to do the same."

Parallel to programs in medical schools, there is progress in the science of humanism as well. Dr. David T. Stern, vice chair of professionalism at Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York said "what makes a difference is that we now have ways to measure professional behavior."

"While identifying professionalism, compassion, and patient-centered behavior was once an I-know-it-when-I-see-it-endeaver, deans and faculty can now weigh actual indicators of humanism on evaluations."

Here is the link to the article

Tell all the truth: A poem by Emily Dickinson

Tell all the truth but tell it slant,
Success in circuit lies,
Too bright for our infirm delight
The truth's superb surprise;

As lightning to the children eased
With explanation kind,
The truth must dazzle gradually
Or every man be blind.

Compassion: Common grounds among faiths

I read two different articles but I find the same truth between them on how to live peacefully among our differences. One article is a recent Op-Ed piece by the 14th Dalai Lama on how to create mutual understanding among different faiths. The other article is an interview with Mohsin Hamid, the author of a novel entitled "The Reluctant Fundamentalist". It is about why some Pakistanis join terrorist networks. Here are some of the things that I learn and I believe these lessons can be applied in many contexts such as a workplace, a community, a classroom, among others:

• Open communication and honest interactions with others is a healthy process towards creating a mutual understanding
• Respect, appreciation of others, open mindedness are key qualities that lead to peaceful coexistence
  
• Everyone needs comfortable space to allow them to be themselves and to create a sense of belonging
  

Here are some of the quotes from Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

"I’m a firm believer in the power of personal contact to bridge differences, so I’ve long been drawn to dialogues with people of other religious outlooks. The focus on compassion that Merton and I observed in our two religions strikes me as a strong unifying thread among all the major faiths. And these days we need to highlight what unifies us."

"Granted, every religion has a sense of exclusivity as part of its core identity. Even so, I believe there is genuine potential for mutual understanding. While preserving faith toward one’s own tradition, one can respect, admire and appreciate other traditions."

Here are some quotes from Hamid's interview with NPR:

"A type of terrorists is a phenomenon of globalization. It is about two cultures touching each other and in the process of touching each other, generating this anger."

"You have people who come from one culture, live in another, enter a state of turmoil and then lash out. It is not just a Pakistani man who has come to America, it is a Pakistani-American man who can't stand being Pakistani-American any longer."

"More interaction between the two cultures, not less, is the key to a happier existence for those who might feel drawn by different loyalties."

"If we make a comfortable space for people to be Pakistani-American and similarly for people in Pakistan, who aren't Pakistani-American, to be comfortable having American cultural exposure--you know, wearing jeans, listening to rock music, etc.-- then we create a kind of safe space.

But as soon as we start saying that Pakistanis in America are suspect, then we start shutting down this positive space. So I think that this suspicion actually feeds off itself and sets in motion a kind of dangerous exclusion that leads to people like this feeling they have to choose one side or the other.”